Hero Collecting

If there's one thing I've learned, it's that all of our heroes will let us down. We find out that this one's an alcoholic, that one abandoned his kid, and the other one used to have a mullet. The thing that we have to learn after that, is that that's OK. We can still want the work ethic of the first without his vices, the charisma of the second without his child-abandoning tendencies, and even the physical strength of the third without his dark past of questionable stylistic choices.

This leads me to my main point - you should be a hero collector. When you have a wide range of heroes to pick from, you can really isolate the traits you want. When I'm in a tough spot at work, I ask myself what my old GM would do. When I'm struggling to get the mental energy to work out, I think, "Would Rocky just sit here when there's training to be done?" How laughable would I seem to Voltaire when I feel like playing a phone game instead of reading, when the only thing that ever stopped him was lack of access to books?

When you have lots of heroes, life gets a lot easier. Having heroes makes you feel like Simba looking up at his ancestors in the stars. You know that you can't fail with such greatness watching over you. Emerson said to go where there is no path and leave a trail, but I say to hell with that (for now - he's right, we're just not there yet). If you were trying to build a shed, would you ignore the lumber yard and hardware store, and try fashioning your own axe to fell trees? Work with what you've got. Stand on the shoulders of giants.

So where do you find these giants? I try to find them everywhere I can. I have role models for as many aspects of my life as possible. Ross Enamait is my working out in cold-ass weather hero. My father is my hero when it comes to cooking or making smart financial moves (although I have a secondary financial hero as well). Zen heroes? I have 3 or 4. Juggling heroes, writing heroes, parenting heroes, style heroes. They're in books, on the internet, in your every day life from family time to grocery shopping (see someone at the store who's hair you like? Snap a picture and show it next time you get your hair cut). Seek them out and add them to your collection.

Once you have some heroes picked out, Bruce Lee them. Accept what is useful, discard what is useless, and add what is uniquely your own.

What is useful? We're looking for behaviors here that we can emulate. So if hero A is really strong, how did he get that way? Did he do heavy barbell training, or was he out swinging a pickaxe or hammer all day for his job? How did Hero B become so successful in business? Did he have a day job at first to finance his entrepreneurial dream, or did he set out on his own all at once? It's not always best to look at what they're doing now. Look for what they did to get where they are.

What is useless? Traits other than the ones we're trying to emulate, things that they were given rather than earned, vices, negative thought patterns. You may want James Bond's skill set, charisma, sense of style, and way with women, but you probably don't want to be as miserable as he is.

I keep ending up drunk on scenic beaches with beautiful women who want to nail me.

What a bullshit life.

Which brings us to the final part of the Bruce Lee equation - adding what is uniquely your own. This is when our Emerson quote comes into play. Once you've gathered your heroes, decided what you want from them, figured out what you need to do to get what you want from them, and started doing those things, you end up with... you! Has anyone gathered all of the traits that you want in one place? Why not be the first? Go on, trailblazer. Be the first person to ever bench 300 lbs, run a successful retail store, and get a novel published all in one life. Be the first person to win a pro boxing match and read the entire Story of Civilization by Will (and Ariel) Durant. Be the first person to play Magic: The Gathering and have a girlfriend.

Of course, the most important thing to remember from all this is that this is not wishing that you were like someone else. This isn't wishing that you were as strong as Dan Green, or as good a guitar player as Tommy Emmanuel. This is about finding out how your heroes got to their own heroic status, and doing what worked for them. This is about taking action. If you sit around thinking about people that are better than you all day, you're not going anywhere. Life is about doing shit, but that's a blog post for another week. Until next time, I wish you the best of luck (which you should be making yourself).